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a half-fire elemental bone naga surrounded by cloudkill and incendiary cloud effects

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advanced cadavar collector/slaughterstone eviscerator amalgam

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Originally posted by Count Dooku

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a half-fire elemental bone naga surrounded by cloudkill and incendiary cloud effects

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advanced cadavar collector/slaughterstone eviscerator amalgam

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And your accusing your PLAYERS of being wacky? [:D]

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Originally posted by orcdoubleax

The crazys act I ever saw didn't involve 6 templates or combinations of powerful magical items. It involved something far worst "Evil PCS".

The PC had just defeat a Druid and small community of halflings. Killing everyone except the children who they locked in a room.

In the process they had fought in the druid magical glad on a collection of small island connected by little wooden bridges. The catch was that the water is magically cold and would do severe damage to anyone who was knock in it. 5d6 cold damage. No-one had fallen in the water during the fight and the party did not know for sure how cold it was.

There was a chest sitting in the water that they wanted to recover, but first they wanted to test the water. One member decide to drop some rope in to see if it was cold enought to damage the rope. only one party member had any rope and he decided it was too vaulable to risk. Likewise he didn't want to give up his ten foot pole.

So instead he went and got one of the Halfling children and grabing him by the ankle dip him in achellis stlye. Making an halfling popsicle. After that they try a second one just to make sure that it was still as cold.

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An Important Safety Tip!

Mark Steuer recounts this tale:

Many years ago (back when we all were still playing D & D), I ran a game where I pitted two groups against each other.

Several members of Group One came up with the idea of luring Group Two into a trap. You remember the Hand of Vecna and the Eye of Vecna that were artifacts in the old D&D world where if you cut off your hand (or your eye) and replaced it with the Hand of Vecna (or the Eye) you'd get new awesome powers? Well, Group One thought up The Head of Vecna.

Group One spread rumors all over the countryside (even paying Bards to spread the word about this artifact rumored to exist nearby). They even went so far as to get a real head and place it under some weak traps to help with the illusion. Unfortunately, they forgot to let ALL the members of their group in on the secret plan (I suspect it was because they didn't want the Druid to get caught and tell the enemy about this trap of theirs, or maybe because they didn't want him messing with things).

The Druid in group One heard about this new artifact and went off in search of it himself (I believe to help prove himself to the party members...) Well, after much trial and tribulation, he found it; deactivated (or set off) all the traps; and took his "prize" off into the woods for examination. He discovered that it did not radiate magic (a well known trait of artifacts) and smiled gleefully.

I wasn't really worried since he was alone and I knew that there was no way he could CUT HIS OWN HEAD OFF. Alas I was mistaken as the Druid promptly summoned some carnivorous apes and instructed them to use his own scimitar and cut his head off (and of course quickly replacing it with the Head of Vecna...)

Some time later, Group one decided to find the Druid and to check on the trap. They found the headless body (and the two heads) and realized that they had erred in their plan (besides laughing at the character who had played the Druid)...The Head of Vecna still had BOTH eyes! They corrected this mistake and reset their traps and the Head for it's real intended victims...

Group Two, by this time, had heard of the powerful artifact and decided that it bore investigating since, if true, they could use it to destroy Group One. After much trial and tribulation, they found the resting place of The Head of Vecna! The were particularly impressed with the cunning traps surrounding the site (one almost missed his save against the weakest poison known to man). They recovered the Head and made off to a safe area.

Group Two actually CAME TO BLOWS (several rounds of fighting) against each other argueing over WHO WOULD GET THEIR HEAD CUT OFF! Several greedy players had to be hurt and restrained before it was decided who would be the recipient of the great powers bestowed by the Head... The magician was selected and one of them promptly cut his head off. As the player was lifting The Head of Vecna to emplace it on it's new body, another argument broke out and they spent several minutes shouting and yelling. Then, finally, they put the Head onto the character.

Well, of course, the Head simply fell off the lifeless body. All members of Group Two began yelling and screaming at each other (and at me) and then, on their own, decided that they had let too much time pass between cutting off the head of a hopeful recipient and put the Head of Vecna onto the body.

SO THEY DID IT AGAIN!... [killing another PC]

In closing, it should be said that I never even cracked a smile as all this was going on. After the second PC was slaughtered, I had to give in (my side was hurting)...

And Group Two blamed ME for all of that...

So let that be a warning to you - don't let your head get cut off unless you really know what you're doing.

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Originally posted by maijstral


3) Still a rogue, always a rogue, the party was fighting a Xorn and not doing very well they were having trouble hitting the thing. The Player knew the prone rules (see above) made something much easier to hit so he was always trying to trip in battles now. He spent the entire battle trying to trip the Xorn despite our telling him it was almost impossible. An 8000 pound creature with 3 legs and half in the ground just can't be tripped, he insisted with the right leverage he could trip anything,his exact quote was " I can trip a tank", his goal seemed to be to get 2 nat 20's in a row. Now adays his new quote is "I can trip anything except a Xorn."

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Originally posted by Thenameless

"I can trip a tank"????? This guy sounds hilarious. I want him in our playgroup.

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Originally posted by B

Tell them about the wooden shoes, grim [:D]

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Originally posted by Arandae

[quote]Originally posted by Thenameless

"I can trip a tank"????? This guy sounds hilarious. I want him in our playgroup.

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Originally posted by Arandae

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Originally posted by Thenameless

"I can trip a tank"????? This guy sounds hilarious. I want him in our playgroup.

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Can he be rented? [)]

The strangest thing in any of my games came from my own character (an elven bard) in a game of Middle Earth Roleplaying Game (MERP). We had only just started playing it, and were trying to get to grips with the wide variety of skills each character possessed - i.e. we were trying out every skill as often as humanly possible. There had been no actual combat situations yet, and we came across a herd of deer - the closest thing to combat so far. We were hungry, and I decided that my bard should try one of his skills to lure one of the deer towards us, in order to kill it and make a tasty meal(and me, a vegetarian!). My bard attempted to 'mimic' a deer mating call. My roll was so appalling that the DM decided that he had accidentally reproduced a call denoting extreme and immediate danger. All the deer stampeded, and one headed straight for the bard. One session into the campaign and my bard was in a coma with an uncountably large number of broken bones. (Under the weird xp system of MERP, sustaining the most serious category of a critical hit gave the bard so many xp that it took the others many sessions to catch up, even though my bard was too injured to do anything at all!)

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Originally posted by B

"The Shoe is mightier than the Warlock"

This episode happened in an old 2nd edition campaign of Grim's. It started out as a normal "european" fantasy campaign, but due to the combination of portals and thieves it became an oriental campaign for a while. I was playing a paladin/samurai, and we also had a thief/monk, an archer, and one player who would end up killing himself pretty often...so he was the other guy. When we arrived in the oriental land we started seeking out masters, and learning all kinds of cool martial arts. I gave up my sword and began using two Bokken (wooden swords) to deal non-lethal damage. The big-bad-evil-guy was a high level warlock who had made a pact with an evil god to make himself immune to weapons. He demonstrated this by shoving a dagger through his heart and then laughing at us.

We did not know it at the time, but his pact didn't make him immune to all weapons.

We eventually get caught up in the resistance movement (oh, the BBEG had an army and was in the process of taking over the world), and we were sent to retrieve a magic flute that was in a temple in the main city that he ruled over.

So, we get to the city dressed as members of his army, and we're told at the gate that no weapons are allowed. Fine. We give up our weapons, and enter the city. We located where the flute is being held, and figure that we need a diversion for out thief/monk to sneak in and get it.

At this point the BBEG comes parading down the street with minions in tow, and proceeds to browbeat the peasants nearby. Then he punches a little girl. Remember, this is a high level wizard who has signed a pact with a god to make himself immune to harm. He has horns and everything. We don't have any weapons.

I charge.

The monk takes this opportunity to walk into the temple, ask a monk if this is the magic flute of whatchamacallit, pick up the flute, and jump out the window.

I hit the BBEG like a ton of bricks, grab his robe and hook it over his horns hockey style, and start beating him with my wooden shoe. He starts screaming like a little girl. It turns out that only wood can harm him. We didn't know that until now. I take off my other wooden shoe and start fighting two weapon style with my shoes. I end up knocking him unconscious while half of his army stared at me with slack jaws.

Suffice it to say, he lost all respect from his army and was run out of every town that he controlled by peasants with sharpened sticks.

I still laugh at the memory of Grim's face when I told him I started beating him with my wooden shoes. [:D]

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